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Happy almost-Halloween 2016!! I drew this vampire for you. If you are unfamiliar with this cuddly fella, you can see him in Nosferatu (1922), Nosferatu: Phantom der Nacht (1979) and also in Shadow of the Vampire (2000). These are great movies to watch during the Halloween season (or anytime, really).

I’ve decided that I’m not going to make new Ghost Wiener comics this year. I’m just not feelin’ it. Depending on how many people tell me they’re upset about this, I may or may not make some for 2017.

 

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I’m crazy about Mrs. Renfro’s Ghost Pepper Salsa. So good! It was only a matter of time before I drew this. Happy Halloween!

 

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The ghost wiener continues to ruin days. This year, it’s picking on a vampire. Happy Halloween!

 

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Hard to believe this is the tenth Ghost Wiener strip. Drawing this made me realize that having a skeleton army would be immensely rewarding. It’d be hard not to feel like a successful general when your men are always smiling. Happy Halloween!

 

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I know I’m a bit late with these this year, but hey, at least it’s still Halloween!

 

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Don’t tell me you’ve never thought of this.

 

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I decided to color that card I made a couple months ago. Playing with this was like a little vacation.

 

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This is the second Null & Void comic I’ve made (the first was in November 2012), but I’d like to do more of them. This idea happened this morning, out of nowhere, and I decided to treat myself. Click on the image for FULL VIEW.

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My Yoda eye surgery design was selected, so I added some black spotting and shading. This is the final art for the project, but since I’ve already got a clean line art scan, I hope to post a color version in the future.

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I was asked to create a get-well-soon card for someone facing eye surgery. This is one of the doodles I pitched.

spare_changeI’m happy to announce that I expect to receive copies of my new mini this coming week (03/31-04/04). I’ll make them available in the store ASAP, and I’ll have copies with me at SPACE (04/12-04/13). Spoiler Alert: These aren’t “technically” mini-comics, I suppose. The image above is the cover, but many of the interior pages contain similar detail work. My intention was to make a small (~3×5) booklet, but as I spent more and more time on the illustrations, I began to think bigger might be better. Therefore, the finished product is an 8.5×11 booklet, and all of the illustrations are full-size.

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Man, it’s been too long since I posted a new drawing on this page! I’ve been working on this Angry Teddy for awhile though, off-and-on, and I didn’t want to post it until I thought I had it right. I’m planning to use this image on a postcard-sized business card, so this would be the front, and the back would have my contact info and URLs and stuff. As always, you should be able to click on the image for FULL VIEW.

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Behold! Your final Ghost Wiener comic of 2013! I got a little carried away with the line work. It… happens, sometimes. Happy Halloween! Click the image for FULL VIEW.

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Halloween is just around the corner! I’ve been too busy this year to make all the Bonus Comics I want, but I couldn’t let 2013 slip away without making a couple featuring the Ghost Wiener. Click on the image for FULL VIEW. I’ll post #8 later in the week.

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Happy Sunday, guys! Here’s a comic that is probably set in a church. Probably. Click the image for FULL VIEW.

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Thanks to my pal Steve Gurski for the conversation which led to this idea, as well as the final sequencing. Click on the image for FULL VIEW!

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After a lllooooonnnnggg hiatus, the Action Bros are back in a non-stop thrill ride of a new Bonus Comic! The boys are getting ready to party down, though perhaps one of them has forgotten how? Click on the image for FULL VIEW.

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Foxes enjoy their privacy at least as much as other folks. Click on the image for FULL VIEW.

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I haven’t had the time to post a new Bonus Comic in awhile, even though I’ve got tons of ideas. I found a little time this week, though! Click the image for FULL VIEW.

I am pretty excited to see The Hobbit this week! Can you tell? I don’t work with color files too often, so I’ll have to put a little more work in before I can submit it to Teefury, but man-oh-man, I would love to see this become a t-shirt! I can’t do this many colors myself yet, though, and to have them printed by an outside agency would be too expensive. I’ll figure something out, one of these days. My motivation, as usual, is purely selfish.

Hey, guys! I took today off from my job, so I thought I would post an extra comic for you. This one’s been knockin’ around for awhile, and the characters in it have been knockin’ around even longer than that. I think I would like to make more comics featuring Null and Void (those are their names). Will it happen? I don’t know! Maybe! But, you should definitely click on that there image for the FULL VIEW of the comic, that way you can see all the juicy glory.

Happy Halloween, you guys! In this, the final of the year’s Ghost Wiener comics, the world-famous Caped Crusader has stumbled upon the infamous Ectoplasmic Unmentionable! It seems as though our poor, little Ghost Wiener is sleeping, perhaps weary from a long few days of haunting. Hard to tell, though. As I am not a biologist, I can only guess at the posture and behavior of disembodied, and indeed, insubstantial, genitalia, no matter how ghastly. Click on the image for FULL VIEW (or don’t, you know, your choice).

Welp, it’s almost Halloween, so tradition dictates that I make some Ghost Wiener comics for you! If you aren’t familiar with the Ghost Wiener, please scroll down a ways to find the previous four installments. This idea sprang forth from a movie trailer in which I thought I saw a ghostly-white wiener hanging over an unsuspecting person’s bed. I was in a bar at the time, the trailer was on TV. I was drinking (heavily?) and probably mistaken. The details are below! Patches the Mean Clown is also a character I’ve drawn in a previous Bonus Comic, you will find that comic below as well, in it he makes a dog sad. I hope I will have time to make one more spooky installment to post on or around 10/31… we shall see! Please click on the image for FULL VIEW, unless the sight of ghostly wieners is something that might ruin your day, in which case please don’t do that.

Sometimes I am plagued by the Big Questions of existence, pondering them as I lay awake at night. One such question, which has been wrestled with by some of the greatest minds in history, is: How much must the Incredible Hulk drink before he is drunk? For those of us who are normal humans, the amount of alcohol required varies depending on weight, the foods recently consumed, and perhaps the state of mind of the individual. And, while some of our favorite superhumans are able to drink with impunity (Wolverine comes to mind, with his healing factor), the situation is not so clear for some others. Depending on the particular incarnation of the Hulk, his transformation may be fueled by rage, the setting sun, or some other such device. Would being blind drunk constitute a return of Dr. Bruce Banner? Would the amount of alcohol consumed remain in Dr. Banner’s system, therefore killing him? Or, would the Hulk simply fall down with a thundering crash, immovable by any known means, there to sleep it off? Click on the image for FULL VIEW.

I suppose it is possible that one or more of you have never heard the marshmallow joke, but that would say something very sad about the world in which we live, and I’m just not ready to face such a reality. I took a few liberties, but I think that I have captured the essence of the joke in these three panels. I am unaware of the identity of the original joke’s author, though I am positive that this person was a luminary in the strictest sense. I urge you to click on the image for FULL VIEW.

It seems like I see people wearing these TapouT® (Tap Out? Tapout? Tap-out?) shirts and hats and wristbands and sunglasses everywhere I go. I guess it has something to do with mixed martial arts and televised events of same, but the designs are pretty ambiguous. They could just as easily be for a musical act, or even just a clothing company with no affiliation or tie-in to anything else at all, like Banana Republic®, or Bugle Boy or something. Anyway, it seemed to me that this whole Tap Out thing could use a frame of reference. Go ahead and click on the image for FULL VIEW.

It struck me the other day that there are about a million instances of contemporary film roles which would have been filled perfectly by actors and actresses who are now retired or deceased. This occurred to me when I realized, out of the blue, that Charton Heston would have made the best Punisher. Click on the image for FULL VIEW.

I’ve always felt that where many cults have historically gone wrong is in their under- or poor-use of marketing. You are much more likely to attract followers and general interest in your thoughts and ideas if you have an attractive logo. Now, over in the Angst & Ennui story, there’s been plenty of talk on Hank Faix’s News® and in the various government agency circles of a Stoned Monkey Cult – a growing following of Zigzag, the mutated, weed-smoking little monkey. Determined to ensure that such a group would not suffer from the same pitfalls of cults I’ve observed and read about here in the REAL world, I sat down and drew the most compelling Stoned Monkey Cult logo I could. Click on the image for FULL VIEW.

This all started because I had Hall & Oates’ “I Can’t Go For That” stuck in my head (a coworker’s computer chimes in a way that reminds me of this song, every time he gets or sends an email). As the song repeated in my mind, I started to think about the lyrics. It’s difficult not to. “I can’t go for that,” we’re told, more than once. But what, exactly, won’t he/they go for? The answer is in the preceding lines: “You got the body, now you want my soul. Don’t even think about it, say no go.” They’ve buried it, but the key here is the word “soul.” Pretty much, Mr.s Hall and Oates are laying it down for all the brides of Dracula out there, letting them know not to even bother. You got the body, ladies. But if you happen to turn out to be a crazy bloodsucking vampire, trying to claim the souls of these two gents, then prepare yourself for a stake, jump kicked through your black heart. Because Hall & Oates can’t go for that.

I couldn’t quite decide how to draw my idea though, until I happened upon a photo of the cover for Buffy the Vampire Slayer, the film from 1992.

Yep, I’ve already started my drawings for the sweet Xmas cards I plan to make this year! I thought I’d share one with you, so you don’t get any funny ideas about buying Xmas cards someplace else. Rest assured, every one of my other ideas is at least this awesome. Click on a toe for FULL VIEW.

Last week, I drew my Wizard vs Wizard Bonus Comic (scroll down, if you don’t remember), and by pal Jess Groot told me I should flesh it out into a T-shirt design that folks might want to wear on their bodies. As usual, after a brief period of denial, I decided to take some good advice. I did a bit of work to the image, and sent it to the folks over at Teefury. I’m not saying that they’ll print it, but the idea that they might gave me the impetus to get the design ready to go. It was fun! Maybe I’ll do the same with some of my other doodles… Please click on the image to enjoy all the FULL VIEW glory.

I’ve had this one bumping around in my head for awhile, and it was time to bust it loose! I’m not saying “don’t hate,” now, but I just think you’ll look smarter if you do your homework first. And that’s really why I’m here, guys. To make you look as smart as possible. Do you need the FULL VIEW? Then just click the image!

Here’s a quick doodle for you, since I slacked-off a little in the Bonus Comic department this week! I really like the idea that we should ask as many questions as we need to in order to understand what’s going on around us, but just maybe it’s not necessary to question EVERYTHING. Enjoy what’s left of your weekend!

So the other day, I was flipping out because I had this idea about wizards who are also spies (or spies who are also wizards, whatever), and one thing led to another until… well, the above is the end result. Or is it? I’m kinda still flipping out. Click on the image for FULL VIEW.

I missed drawing Bonus Comics last week, guys! To help me feel better about it, I spent some time on this idea I had while I was out of town. This is the classic, eternal struggle between paper, scissors, and rock, but with a little twist and embodied through wizards! Click on the image for FULL VIEW.

Here’s another couple things that sound similar, and this time I made sure they were very different indeed! If you’re not familiar with the Furies, hop on the ol’ Google and check ’em out, because they’re pretty neat characters. Also, they’ve been borrowed by many authors, so it’s possible that you actually are familiar with one of their incarnations, and you just don’t know it! Click on the image for FULL VIEW.

I’ll admit it, I don’t think I’ve really ever tried to listen to Yanni. The only reason I know he exists is the commercials that used to run on TV when I was a kid. I’m pretty sure he was always “live at red rocks,” and that didn’t make a whole lot of sense. I guess Red Rocks is the proper name for a place, but at the time, I just thought it was funny, in a nonsensical kind of way. Click on the image for FULL VIEW, and let those piercing eyes capture your soul.

Axl Rose was in the news this week, and that made me think of a song called “Rocket Queen” from the Guns N’ Roses album “Appetite for Destruction.” Rocket Queen was a bit of a mystery for me back in the days when I discovered GNR, which was years before the Internet made many such mysteries easily solvable. I knew that Axl was a pretty macho dude, and that the hair and the makeup was just part of the scene back then, so I couldn’t figure out what he could mean by referring to himself as a Rocket Queen. I have since learned that he was actually talking about a person that he and several other of the band members knew, back when they got their start. Thanks, Wikipedia! Click on the image for FULL VIEW.

My original idea was just “pandamonium,” like some pandas going nuts. I thought that was what pandemonium was, people going nuts and stuff. I should have known better! Now I do. Pandæmonium is the capital of Hell in John Milton’s Paradise Lost… he invented the word specifically to be the epicenter of, like, day-to-day life for demons and spirits. I started thinking about this in light of the panda idea, and I thought it would be rad as all get-out if there was a bunch of demon-lookin’ pandas and if they had their own city where they could just do whatever, like maybe play some cards. Why not? Also, this is a little more unique than the pandas-going-nuts thing, since if you Google images for “pandemonium,” you pretty much get a bunch of that type of thing. Banksy’s got a stencil of a panda on his hind legs, with an automatic pistol in each fore-paw. No way was I gonna beat that. Click on the image for FULL VIEW.

News Flash: Everyone has bad days. EVERYONE. Some of us have to fight for every little joy, just because our brains are broken. Spreading misery just creates more misery; smiling when you’re not happy actually helps make you kinda happy (and those around you, because smiles are contagious, too). Don’t worry if you feel like an idiot for a minute, smiling for no reason, because I can guarantee that when you’re scowling, you pretty much look like an idiot the whole time. Of course, when you’re by yourself, scowl all you want. Just don’t rain on my parade, because my parade is fucking amazing. It’s got floats and all that shit. Click on the image for FULL VIEW.

Don’t agree that they sound similar? Say them quickly, and slur a little bit. Go ahead and try it; I’m not going anywhere. I could have gone another way with this, you know… but then I’d have had to either not draw peanuts or not draw pennies and, well, seriously. No brainer. Click the image if you wanna see the FULL VIEW.

I have no choice but to think about trains, pretty much all day long. Where I work, there are train tracks right behind us and also in front of the building, across the street. We are the last address before an intersection, which means that just about anytime I’m trying to be on the phone to do some business (always), there is some crazy-loud train whistle type shit going on. Right now, dudes are working on the track behind us, so the toots are more frequent, you know, to warn those guys, since you can’t possibly know that a train is coming without the whistle. It’s so fuckin’ great, I decided to draw a train in my off-time. I’ll be honest though; none of the trains that go by are even remotely as bitchin’ as this one. As always, click on the image for FULL VIEW.

Now these two sound extremely similar! And yet, I’m willing to bet they are different in almost every way… except, perhaps at the expense incurred in their creation. That requires some explaining – I really don’t know too much about Master P, other than that he had an opportunity to make a tidy sum of money on several albums in the late nineties and early two-thousands, and that he continued to sign new talent even after his own popularity as an artist seemed to fade. Knowing what I know about Americans in general and our devotion to television and movies, I’m willing to bet that Master P’s home theater is impressive, to say the least. All I chose to draw was the end recliner section of what I conceived of as a sectional upholstered in white leather, complete with drink holders in the armrests. The hosting set for Masterpiece Theater, on the other hand, while perhaps not actually extravagant, is certainly made-up to resemble an English-style sitting room; not where one might watch television, but enjoy a novel. With a roaring fire in the heavily-carved marble-faced fireplace and a crystal snifter of aged brandy in hand. So, while quite different, also similar in that no expense has been spared. If you want to see the FULL VIEW, feel free to click on the image.

My father and grandmother are big John Wayne fans; I have seen a ton of his more popular films, especially the westerns, many, many times. I have a great deal of respect for the man and his accomplishments, and I guess that I would count myself as a fan, also… but that doesn’t stop him from being a giant turd. Nobody’s infallible! Click on that big ‘ol honker for the FULL VIEW.

Whoa! I’ll bet you didn’t know that wizards were so dang flexible, did you? A special thanks to my pal Jess Groot for typing the word combination “strip wizard,” which led directly to this hot mess of a Bonus Comic. Way to go, Jess! Are you brave enough for the FULL VIEW???

Every gal needs a way to take out her aggressions, and I think moms probably have aggressions multiplied  by their number of children. But what’s a mom to do, when one of life’s speed bumps is an inability to find a good sitter during derby? Here’s my silly look at a possible solution. No matter if there’s a little boy or a little girl in that stroller, the kid’s bound to pick-up some valuable lessons from a couple of times around the rink. Click anywhere you like (respectively) for FULL VIEW.

Aw, I think he hurt Horis’s feelings. I mean, shit, if you don’t like it, don’t eat it! Looks to me like ol’ Horis could stand to pack on a few pounds. Seriously though, did you ever notice that hobos are the skinniest? Screw Weight Watchers, just try jumping trains and living outdoors for awhile! Click on that steaming pot of you-know-what for FULL VIEW.

The more I think about it, the more similarities I can come up with: funny suits, explosions, expensive hardware, hazard pay… but the differences are really fundamental. With NASA, the explosions serve to propel the astronaut into space; with Nascar, the guy just blows up. In Nascar, the funny suits seem to attract hoards of women; this does not seem to be the case in NASA (though perhaps this just isn’t widely publicized). Click on the image for FULL VIEW.

One of my main problems with television is the commercials. And I know that digital recorders can eliminate a lot of that crap, but you can’t get away from it completely. Pharmaceutical commercials are the worst! With their snide suggestions that you may need to ingest their product on a regular basis and side effects which seem worse than the symptoms themselves, who in their right mind would actually ask their doctor if (insert flashy marketing word here) is right for them? But you know, people do. Click on that long, toilet paper-looking list for FULL VIEW.

One may lead to the other in certain situations, but on the face of it, they aren’t the same thing at all! Maybe we’ve all been that guy who just can’t seem to get a grip on that endless hacking cough, but I hope none of you have ever been responsible for an under-sized coffin. Not like the user’s going to give much of a damn, but then the user is seldom the actual customer. And customers… well, customers can be rather particular about these types of things. Click on that ol’ image for the FULL VIEW.

What’s the deal with rain gauges? It seems like, when you get to be a certain age, it suddenly becomes extremely important how much rain you catch in there, even though you know you’re just gonna dump it out. I think it would be kinda funny to mess with folks, just walk around adding water to their rain gauges when they’re not looking. Maybe they wouldn’t notice, but if they did, just imagine how perplexed they’d be! Of course, this squirrel has the the right idea, just… you know, nobody’s going to mistake piss for rain. Not when it’s that dark, anyway. You think it’s all the acorns that does that? Click on the image for FULL VIEW (but you still won’t see his winkle).

I got this idea after I watched a movie called Merlin and the Book of Beasts, which was a pretty terrible movie. And I know terrible movies, watch ’em all the time as a matter of fact, so that’s saying quite a bit. Anyway, the Book of Beasts was not a very impressive magical tool (although they were trying pretty hard to make you think otherwise), and I thought, you know what would be waaaay better? A magical book that you could play like a set of turn tables, complete with cross-fade and wah-wah and all that shit! Also, I didn’t like the way Merlin looked in that movie. I much prefer the big floppy hat and robe with stars. Maybe that’s just me? Anyway, put on your favorite remix and click the image for FULL VIEW.

It’s OK to laugh, because this isn’t how it really is, right? Because businesses value employees who think for themselves? Anyway, click on the image for FULL VIEW!

Finally, those crazy hats make sense. Click the mustache for FULL VIEW.

I have heard reports that Jojos aren’t universally available and that strikes me as incredibly sad. Guys, if you don’t know what Jojos are, here’s my best attempt to describe them: take the biggest whole potato you can find (I’m talking fuckin’ MASSIVE), and cut it four times so you have long, fat wedges. Lightly batter and fry until golden brown. Restrain yourself for approximately 5-10 minutes, then dig in! I guess you don’t have to wait, but you’ll burn the shit out of your mouth. Don’t say I didn’t warn you! Click on the image for FULL VIEW.

Nothing too frightening about air freight! Well, unless you’re shipping something that can’t be flipped over ‘cuz it’s fragile and they do the opposite of what they’re supposed to… But still, the snake is probably worse. Click on the image for FULL VIEW.

Whoa, this looks pretty serious! Is this a criminal trial, or does that bailiff always have such a stern look on his face? As always, click on the image for FULL VIEW.

Sometimes, when you are totally stressed-out at your job or you’re just having a bad day, it helps to surf the internet and read some awesome comics. I’m here for you guys!

Dang it feels good to be making Bonus Comics again! I hope you guys like this comic I made about frogs and flies and paper hats. Click on that image to see the FULL SIZE.

HOORAY!! It’s the first Bonus Comic of 2012, and to mark the occasion, I drew a big, crazy mustache. You’re welcome. Click on the image for FULL VIEW.

The Action Bros are at it again, and once more, the prospect of food seems nigh. That is, unless the Bros can manage to confuse/irritate their server to the point of paralysis. Click the image for FULL VIEW.

Gus!! How the hell did you wind-up in a Bonus Comic?! I need to start getting more sleep… click on the image for FULL VIEW and enjoy the delicious detail, as a deer licks a mineral block and stares you in the eye.

This fella is extremely excited about some Manwich! Between you and me, I think it’s got something to do with the full serving of vegetables. If you’d like to see up that nostril in panel two, then by all means click the image for FULL VIEW.

Degenerative brain maladies like dementia and Alzheimer’s effect tons of people everyday and aren’t very funny. Joe, the guy I made up and drew in this comic, is a total asshole for this joke he made about Alzheimer’s. Better click on the image for FULL VIEW so that you can recognize him on the street and plow him over with your luxury sedan.

Hey, a bonus comic! Click on the image for FULL VIEW (whoa).

Guess what? This almost happened to me. Except, the woman didn’t crook her eyebrows or purse her lips… and didn’t ask me a question. Pretty much, 2% of this happened to me. The rest is pure fabrication. Click on the image for FULL VIEW and bask in the lies.

My friend (we’ll call him “Steve”) had this idea and made the mistake of telling me about it… and I made it reality! Well, I made it a comic. Click on the image for FULL SIZE and marvel at the depravity! (Please, don’t try this at home. This dog is a trained professional.)

Guys, meet Brant Minifigure, MD. You can trust him, guys, because he’s a doctor. Click on the image for FULL VIEW.

The Action Bros are back, and this time they’re taking on Steven Seagal and Basketball… in the same three panels! Damn, these bros are action-y!! Click on the image for FULL VIEW.

Jest Rider is sort of this idea I had about what it would look like if Ghost Rider was somehow a clown, also? Like, maybe the clown had to become Ghost Rider to avenge some clown-type shit? A-and, he’s such a goofy dude that the Spirit of Vengeance can’t quite make himself look as classy as he’d like? (If you don’t know what Ghost Rider is, probably you should get out of the house and rent a Nick Cage movie once in a while.) Click on the image for a larger view!

Have you ever had the opportunity to write on someone’s shopping list? Also, what would a pound of awesome cost? Are there different grades? Could I get awesome steaks or maybe some awesome chuck? Awesome filets? Dangit, now I’m hungry. (click on the image for full view)

Here’s the second Ghost Wiener comic for 2011. While it follows the typical Ghost Wiener event, I have added the element of the X-Men into the mix. For those of you who aren’t familiar with these characters, Cyclops is the codename of a guy who can shoot laser beams out of his eyes. Sometimes, he and his pals fight a guy codenamed Magneto, who has complete control over magnetic force. Against such a deadly foe, one must surely need complete concentration. Click on the image for a larger view.

For Halloween weekend, I decided to make a couple more Ghost Wiener comics. This one is called “Ding Dong.” Also, if you don’t know about the Ghost Wiener, then scroll down some until you see the two comics I made last year. As always, click on the image for a larger view.

I can’t decide if this dad is a fun guy, or an irresponsible parent. I mean, it’s kind of a funny trick to play on his ex-wife (or whatever), but that burrito is bigger than the kid’s head. He’s gonna be farting blood, if he’s not careful. Click on the image for the full view.

These bros are all about takin’ steps to maximize their enjoyment of life. Click on this image to see the comic at full size, and marvel as these fellas buy some mac and cheese which they think will be awesome, but which ends up being anything but.

Here is a new Bonus Comic, featuring a bear! He is the talking kind of bear and also full of bad news, though this is something about his situation that bothers him deeply. Click on the image to see a larger view.

Please enjoy this bonus comic in which Patches the Mean Clown accosts a circus stray.

This bonus comic represents my thoughts on the water vs. beer question sometimes. I would like to be a healthy person, but also I would like to be drinking beer whenever I like. Which would be quite often. If only water could take on different flavors, and maintain its health benefits. Alternatively, perhaps there is a tasty beer someplace which is also good for you? Yeah, probably not. Click on the comic for LARGER views.

I made another bonus comic for you! Click on the image for larger views.

Please enjoy this bonus comic about Pretirement. This is a concept that I developed some time ago, and while I thought it had a good chance of catching on in colloquial speech, I neglected to actually use it. Hence, no one else knew that THEY were supposed to be using it. And so it has not caught on. Are you a pretiree? Do you know someone who is effectively pretired? We can help draw attention to these people. Do your part to spread pretirement awareness.

I guess it is pretty obvious by now that I am a Marvel Comics fan. I have heard some grousing about all the Deadpool appearances and titles and etc., but I think most of it is great. And so what if he’s not a mutant? He would still be my favorite X-Man if Cyclops would quit taking his stupid pills and let Wade on the team.

I hope you enjoy the second installment of the Ghost Wiener series! Consider this my contribution to Halloween.

I got this idea when I saw the trailer for Wes Craven’s My Soul To Take. I was at a bar and not really paying attention to the TV. I looked up at the very end of the trailer; the main character is in bed, looking up, and for a second I thought that there was a wiener above him. Actually, it is a finger from the hand that is about to descend upon his face, but for a minute it seemed like a pale, weird-looking wiener. A Ghost Wiener.

Christine O’Donnell is a witch running for public office. In Delaware. She pretty much admitted to being a witch when she was talking to Bill Maher in 1999 (link ). But now she is trying to say that she is not a witch so that she can become a US Senator (link ).

I think this is crazy. I would totally vote for someone with magic powers. Wouldn’t you? Christine, if you are reading, please – embrace who you are!

This is an unoriginal idea I had. Every Wolverine fan knows that he injures himself a little whenever he pops his claws. Of course, he heals up super fast, but he feels the pain every time. I thought it would be funny if he was a wussy about it. Click the image to see the FULL SIZE.

The Sheriff of Nottingham is a dick

Created for a friend of mine and his new wife. Her favorite song is (Everything I Do) I Do It for You by Bryan Adams, which is prominent in the movie Robin Hood, starring Kevin Costner. Also, she has, like, season passes to the zoo or something. They almost got married there. Click the image to see the FULL SIZE.